Mensch Werden (ptuscadero) wrote in blistcelebs,
Mensch Werden

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remember that time i said "no one close to me ever walks away happy"?
and you said "well, i don't want to walk away." remember that?
remember the hard floor beneath us. me sad, you worried.
my tears and your invited pokes? you said you didn't want to walk away.
and you are.
walking slowly away. and not that i blame you.
or me. or anything either of us control.
but sure as shit, there you go.
smiling all the way. you haven't turned your back,
and so you look, and wave, and smile that smile
with those teeth and your eyes all bluegreygreen.
something is pulling you away.
and i'm not sure i'm pulling back.
not pulling or pushing.
just watching. and smiling when i have the energy.

when the weight of the world isn't crushing my soul.
when the weight of my soul isn't crushing your world.

you shouldn't be so perfect. everything shouldn't be telling me that you're right for me.
and if you are, than why can't i have you?
and if i can than why don't i?
and if i do then why can't i tell?
does this happen to ayone else? or am i the only one whose dreams come true?
am i the only one afraid to hurt.
am i the only one who can never touch what i have.
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