early summer mornings on the lawn outside our house
Mark stared into the perfect pink sky. "Sure is a nice sky out, tonight." "Huh?" was the answer he got. Undaunted he continued staring. And pondering. And commenting. "The clouds are so puffy and pink." "Yeah," Was all the reply he got. He didn't mind. He just lay back and relaxed, and let the feelings take over him. Mark tried to ignore the silence, and listened only to the rhythmic crushing sounds his back was making on the grass. He wondered if Joseph was done. He had no reason to believe that he was, but wondering was fun, and so he let himself do it for a little while longer. As the sun was setting he saw it reflected in Joe's eyes, and wanted to say something. Something about how pretty it all looked, in the summer, on their lawn. Something about the way the blue and gold in the sky interacted with the blue and gold in Joe's eyes. But he didn't want to interrupt again. Joseph looked pretty intent on finishing his job. He went back to listening to the grass, and wondrend if his naked back was crushing any living creatures, and shifted, ever so slightly, at the thought, but rested back into the same old position before long. Joseph grunted as if to say "you're not crushing anything, just lay here and be with me." There was something familiar about this. And of course, why wouldn't there be? It wasn't their first summer with the lawn. It wasn't their first kiss. Their first anything. But Mark felt oddly at ease. Like it was all too familiar. Like Joseph's panting was getting boring and the only thing different was the shapes the clouds were making in the sky. Joseph went to kiss him, but he wasn't paying attention, and so just lay there with his mouth hanging open. He felt bad after a while, and after he remembered having done it before, felt even worse. He wanted to make Joseph happy. He wanted to be happy. He lifted his head up, to see the sky in Joe's eyes from another angle. This one wasn't much better. And then Joseph closed his eyes. Mark followed suit. It wasn't the first time they had been on the lawn. Wasn't the first time Joe had drill fucked Mark. But it still seemed so foriegn to him. Joe didn't even recognize the smell of the grass anymore. And as he dug his toes into the earth beneath him, he smiled, to find that it was the same shade of cool it had always been, on those summer afternoons. Joe looked at the way the clouds reflected in Marks eyes and wanted to say something about how the gold and green of the sky intercted with the gold and green of Mark's eyes. But he couldn't seem to catch his breath. And Mark sighed as if to say, "it's okay, I know you love the sky and me, know just lay here and be with me." Joe went to kiss him and his lips fell into Mark's open mouth. He felt bad, like he was interupting something again. That was the third time and he was beginning to think that maybe Mark doesn't love him anymore. He looks away and coninues drill fucking. Mark looks so serene and he wants to tell him how beautiful he is, but he's afraid to break the spell, so he just ponders. Ponders what it would be like if he were alone again. And he shifts his weight on to his elbows, as if to say "I'm glad I'm not alone anymore." And Mark just laughs. Not out loud, but in the way he wiggles his arms up around Joe's neck. Joe wonders if he's finished. He has no reason to think that he is, but it's fun to wonder so he toys around with the idea a little more. Mark asks him if he's done, and he says "yeah. but I just want to lay here." "inside me?" mark asks. "Yeah" is all the reply he gets.